INTO THE PAST WITH PAIN...239

INTO THE PAST WITH PAIN…239

Dr K Prabhakar Rao


(It is the entrance of Hell and it is guarded by the Yamadoots (soldiers) of Lord Yama the god of death. They are weird in appearance with huge built, pot bellies with canine teeth and twin horns on their heads.Their names are Rudraroopa, Vikataroopa and vichitrasura They hold very big swords of strange shapes and look like demons. They look very cruel and fearsome too. Suddenly they find three persons Ekambram, Taja and Appa escorted by few Yamdoots. The leader of the yamadoots who brought the persons is Vikararoopa ( One with ugly looks). He speaks to the guards at the gate. )

Vikararoopa. Look Brother, Vikatasura. We have brought three guys from Earth and these guys belong to India.

Vikatasura. That is fine. But have you gone on your own or some one has sent you?

Vikararoopa. Brother. You know that we can not bring any one here on our own. The death god decides and we get orders from Chitragupta , the record assistant of Hell in turn to get the guys.

Vikatasura.. Oh I forgot about it. To which city these guys belong?

Vikararoopa. All these guys are from Hasthinapura. It is now called Delhi.

Vikatasura. Good. Look, All these guys are over weight and appear to be well fed.

Vikararoopa. Why not? These guys made lot of money in India. All these guys were leaders of political parties. They made tons of money, ate like pigs throughout their lives, drank like fish and slept like hogs. Naturally they get overweight and grow like pigs.

( In the mean time Chitraguta arrives with a a big register. He looks at the people waiting at the gate)

Chitragupta. So, You brought these guys finally. I am happy. Lord Yama will be too happy now.

Appam. Sir. What we have done to be brought to this place? This place looks very fearsome.

Chitragupta. This is hell not a pleasant place to live.

Appa. Eee..eeee.. Please leave me. I am scared.

Ekambram. Sir. All my life I prayed three times to God Shiva. Performed all Pujas and gave donations too.

Chitragupta. But you were highly corrupt and made tons of money.

Ekambram. That every one does in India now. I am not alone.

Chitragupta. All will have their turn too.

Taja. I am innocent. By mistake I am brought here. I am sure .

Chitragupta. No such mistakes are committed here. Your dossier is here. Do you want to see? Every action of individuals are recorded. We have a divine soft ware that records everything every second for all types of creatures. You also made lot of money by corrupt means.

Taja. But I gave lot of money to temples although I do not believe in them, fed poor, gave them clothes.

Chitragupta. Look. You have to suffer. There is no escape. You guys think that no one bothers for your actions. But sadly you are mistaken. You are being watched all the time by some one.

( In the mean time Gandhi, Patel and Nehru are seen passing close by. They are seen singing Ram Bhajan… Ramji Karega beda par.. Udaasi mun kaheko dure….) They come out of gates of heavens that are close to Hell gate. They look at the people at the gates of hell. Gandhi gets interested.)

Gandhi. Patel. There appears to be some problem here. These guys appear to be from India. Some argument is going on here. Shall we help them?

Nehru. Bapu. We are dwellers of heavens. Why get involved here.?

Gandhi. Come on Jawahar. Learn to take care of those who are in trouble.

Patel. Bapu. Better we leave this place and enter gate of heavens.

Gandhi. Do not be a scared crow. We shall see. Move now.

(The trio slowly approaches the gate of hell)

Yamadoot. Look guys. Please do not come very close. Do not make mistake of entering hell gate. You can not go out. That is law.

Gandhi. We shall stay away. What is the problem here? Why argument is going on here?

Chitragupta. I know you guys. You are Mr Gandhi, Nehru and Patel from India. These guys are great sinners and so they were brought to hell. They are not entering the gate and arguing.

Patel. Why waste time with them? You have formula no I.

Nehru. What is that Patel?

Patel. Yamadoots will kick these sinners black and blue and drag them inside. That is normal way. I do not know why they are playing kind with these guys.

Nehru. They were political leaders in India. So they are getting some respect.

Chitragupta. They were pleading with us.

Patel. Look guys. This is no more India where the political leaders could do anything and get away. You have enjoyed enough there. Now get ready for kicks here.

Chitragupta. What is this sir? Do you mean that in India there is no law to punish corrupt guys.

Patel. Laws are there surely. But who will implement? Top to bottom corruption prevails in India. Then who will catch whom? Law makers, law enforcers are also in this ring. That is the problem.

Chitragupta. Is that so bad there? We never knew. Is there no govt there?..

Patel. It is there for namesake. Spineless and timid too. They are trying to save their seats all the time. They are posing as if they are after curbing corruption. But actions are different. They are throttling protest voices by force, by character assassination, use of police force ,withch hunting and probes and enquiries. What else what not?

Chitragupta. This is very bad. I have to tell Yamraj soon. Under any case, all these will be automatically recorded in their life history automatically by our super divine computer.You guys claim that you are advanced in IT and Computers. But you guys are no match to us. You can never overtake us. When some one’s time comes, we get feed back automatically and Yamadoots are ready for action. By the by, what are these seats. Are they special leather seats? Are they like kings thrones?

Patel. Yeah. They are almost like that. They have great power once they sit on the seats. They become autocratic with dictatorial actions. The brains get distorted once some one sits on them.

Chitragupta. Can’t you pull them down? It is in your hands. If you break chairs leg he will immediately fall down.

Gandhi. Look sir. In India we have a system of governing called democracy. People elect some guys to state assemblies and also to parliament that is a higher body. People make groups called parties and contest. Out of these elected guys, some one will become Prime Minister depending up on the majority of any one group. They are called birds of same feather. He is like a swan in a group of crows.

Chitragupta. That means that guy must be most admired guy by every one in that group.

Gandhi. Not necessarily. Some time, the guys is selected by some influential persons who run the party from behind. They are shadow leaders. It is like a Puppet show. In Puppet show, the guy controlling the puppets from behind a curtain operates strings attached to limbs of puppets and they dance in front public watching the show.Puppet show is a great fun.They will select a guy who is ready to act like a puppet.

Chitragupta. That is great indeed. We are absolutely ignorant about this.

( In the mean time, Yamraj arrives holding his great mace. He shouts in thundering voice)

Yama. What is going on here?

Nehru. Bhai. You are a new guy here. Who are you? I am shit scared to look at you.

Yama. Iam Yamunda… Yama.. the lord of death

Nehru. Eee..ee..eeee.

(Nehru closes his eyes and runs and hides behind Gandhi. Patel giggles )

Yama. Who is this scared guy? By the by, who are these guys in funny dresses?

Chitragupta. Sir. They belong to heavens. They happened to come here and are watching us at the gate.

Yama. I see. Now what is the problem? Why this commotion at the gate of Hell?

( Some Yamadoots run and bring a throne for Yama. He sits happily on the throne. He keeps his mace next to him. The mace slips and rolls on to Nehru’s foot. He cries loudly)

Nehru.. ee..eee.. bachao ( Save me) I am hurt. Ee..ee

Yama. I am sorry. I should have been careful.

( Some Yamadoots pick up the mace carefully and keeps it aside this time with great care.)

Gandhi. Never mind sir. These things keep happening. You were not intentional.

Yama. You appear to be a good guy. So you are in heavens. Relax and be at ease. What was the discussion going on here? I heard something from behind.

Gandhi. Once these guys form a government they will continue for five years. Whether it is a rule or misrule people have to suffer. There is no way out. They can not be pulled down. They enjoy majority and if opposition tries a no confidence motion, all ruling guys will vote against the motion. So they continue. It is a crooks galore.

Chitragupta. That is a great joke. In that case, people suffer like in hell.

Gandhi. Hell I think is better. Atleast we suffer in front of Yamraj. We get cleansed of sins. There it is not like that.

Chitragupta. You must be having a king too.

Patel. We do no have a king, but have President.

Yamaraj. What does he do?

Patel. He sits calm cool and enjoys his time and tenure. He passes time visiting places around the country and at times goes for Medical operations that are free of cost.He is busy celebrating mmariage days, birth days etc.All these guys are very old ready to come to you sir. This is a rehabilitation camp for such guys.

Yamaraj. What? Then why is there?

Gandhi. His job is to sign wherever he has to sign on papers duly marked and sent by the ruling party boss. He keeps his pen ready. When required, he sits on decisions for ages. He has no choice. He is like a Rubber stamp along with an Ink pad. He has no choice. He closes his eyes most of the time and enjoys bliss.

Yamraj. What is this rubber stamp?

Gandhi. It is a seal of authority used by kings. It is a royal seal. Haa..Haa..Haa..

Yamraj. When he will go away?

Gandhi. That is when the ruling party wants him to go. They do not want stiff guys. They want ..yes.. men or women. That is the criteria.

Yamaraj. Ha..Haa.. After all you are human beings. Upper story is empty.

Chitraguta. We were discussing misrule if I remember correctly.

Gandhi. There is no way out for this misrule. They have to wait for elections to arrive. Invariably it is after five years.

Yamraj. Oh .No. The period is very long. Any how, in past demons enjoyed power till they reached climax of committing sins. Then Lord Vishnu incarnated himself and killed the demons along with the leader. It happened in all his manifestations.

Gandhi. Sir does it mean that Lord Vishnu will appear again to get rid off these guys I India?

Yamraj. It has to be. Probably their time has not arrived yet.

Patel. ( Cries) How long sir, this suffering?

Yamraj. Have patience. All will be OK soon.

Patel. Sir Thanks and with your assurance, I am relieved much.

Chitragupta. Sir. We were involved in some discussion for long time and I am sorry I forgot to tell you about the three persons who were brought by Yamdoots to hell ( He shows them to Lord of death. The three persons appear cool and calm)

Ekambram ( in low tome) Bhai Taja. What to do now? We are cornered.

Taja. Do not get panicky.

Appa. What is that?

Taja. It is very simple. All guys fall for something. Let us offer some thing to them and bargain for heavens. Appaji, You are also an expert in this game.

Ekambram. Please try. We are with you.

( Taja Calls Chitragupta to side and talks to him)

Taja. Look brother, Please help us. What is your requirement? We are ready for that.

Chitragupta. I can not understand what you say.

Taja. Please do not act. Tell me the figure.

Chitragupta. Which figure? It does not make sense to me.

Taja. I offer Rs three Lakh gold and send us to heavens

Chitagupta. Are you trying to bribe me?

Taja. It is not bribe. It is called Mamool, a Token of presentation for your services.

Yama. What is going on there?

Chitragupta. Sir, these guys are trying to bribe us. They think this is India.

( Yama gets wild and gets up from his throne. He lifts up his mace with great vigor. He yells…..

How dare are these guys!
Who try to bribe us with gold
Hang these guys up side down
And kick them hard for being so bold

What they think of this great Hell
I shall show them life very soon
I shall chew their muscles and bones
And scatter them over sun and moon

They think it is India the corrupt
And ready to buy one and all
Skin these guys now itself in front of me
And hang their heads in hall of infame

I shall smash their heads with this mace
And cut them to pieces with this great knife
These crooks will forget what they were once
And that they enjoyed all their life

Chitragupta. Sir Cool down. We shall tackle them soon.

( He looks at yamadoots and gives orders)

Chitragupta. These guys do not deserve any mercy. They tried to bribe us thinking that this is India where they could do all. Drag them inside, kick them hard with boots, Spear them all along the route. Once they are inside these punishments should be given every day.
Day 1. Trample them under the feet of asses and sink them in shit and Urine pots

Day 2. Cut them with saws limb by limb and apply salt and pepper

Day 3. Skin them limb by limb and fry them in oil

Day 4. Beat them with whips after making cuts on bodies. Drive nails everywhere in their bodies

Day 5 Let lions devour them

Day 6. Throw them down the hill over onto spikes

Day 7. All day long boil them in hot water.

Ekambram, Raja and Appa ( cry loudly). Sir. Please excuse us. We never knew that you are honest unlike Indians. Please save us. We were not alone there in India. There were many guys.

Yama. Nothing doing. I shall bring them soon here.

Gandhi. May I say some thing sir?

Yama. Please go ahead.

Gandhi. Are the punishments justified? Is their any appeal with Lord Vishnu or Shiva?

Yama. This is not earth. My verdict is final. There is no appeal. They do not interfere.

Gandhi. In case of Markandeya your vedict was overruled by Lord Shiva.

Yama. You have good knowledge of scriptures. I am slightly happy with you. These sinners are not like Markandeya. These guys are thieves, Corrupt and big crooks. They have no case.

Patel. Good sir. We have no case to plead for them.

Nehru. Will we land up here some time?

Patel. Yes, Depending on our stay in heavens. Once the time is over, we have to reach here too.

Nehru. Eee..eeee..aa…aaa.. (faints )

Gandhi. Patel. Lift this guy. We shall take him home

( Patel and Gandhi pick up Nehru and walk away after bowing to Yamraj. He smiles)

( Yamraj gets up, takes his mace and walks away while the Yamdoots drag the condemned guys into hell kicking them hard . Other yamdoots laugh)

CURTAIN FALLS