Monday, April 12, 2010

Into the past with pain....97


Dr k Prabhakar Rao

(There is a hall in heavens where an old man is sitting relaxed on a torn blanket on the ground and he has only loin cloth around him He is bald and is of 80 years. He occasionally coughs and appears to be in poor heath. He removes his spectacles and occasionally wipes with an old cloth. Just then, an handsome man of 50 years in safari suit passes the door and peeps in)

Stranger. Hello. Who is there? Oh Gandhiji. Good morning. How are you? How is your health? I was trying to locate you in heavens since long. Dammed tired. Why the hell you are her? How pathetic you are living? How sad you look? What is the matter?

Gandhi. Oh Good evening Zulfikhar Ali Bhutto. How come you are here? I heard about you recently. But you are too early to arrive. You were a kid when I was there. Some time ago, Mohd Ali Jinnah was mentioning about you. What went wrong? I thought after partition, all would be fine. How sad? Jinnah too thought same. Poor Jinnah could not live long. I also could not live long.. Any how it is good. He left his country in time. He became Qaid e Aazam as I became father of nation in India.

Zulfikhar. You are lucky sir. I thought I would be duplicate father of nation of Pakistan. But all is my bad luck. I do not know from where this crazy Zia ul haq came in. He was mad after power. He hanged me by neck ( Cries) eee..eee…allah…eeee… he implicated me in false cases…eee..mardiya mujhko…uss kutte ne….Uss Badmash ne….uss zalim ne…us shaitan ne.. eeee… darindene. ( he has killed me. That dog, .. that crook. that cruel guy, ….That devil.. That bad character…)

Gandhi. Do not cry my son. Whatever happens is for our good. Zia had his strong reasons to eliminate you. Unless he killed you had no future. So all is for good only.

Zulfikhar. How can you say that sir? Do you think Godse has done right thing to you by putting lead in to you at point blank?

Gandhi. Yes. I firmly believe it. (He smiles showing teethooss mouth) I am happy that Godse shot me at point blank so that I could not escape. I am happy he did not use small 0.22 Pistol. He used a solid 0.32 Italian semi auto Pistol that was sure to kill a man. He put lot of bullets into me to make sure that I died. Haaa.haaa. What a nice thing he has done! I am very happy. Even doctors had no chance of saving me. If I had lived, there would have been problems to the rulers and new government. As it is, they were getting impatient with me and getting vexed up with me. Already leaders were un happy with my demand to pay Pakistan Rs 5 crores. Any how my role was over. I foresaw what will happen to congress. So I wanted to dissolve it. Now Look. What happened? It has become a family rule. Mughals have left.A new dynasty of Nehru’s with Gandy’s name has been imposed on India. (Sings and does jig happily)

I am happy that Godse shot me dead
As it is, I became a dead wood
All the leaders were getting vexed up
From outside however they shown smiling lips

How nicely Godse shot me
And he made sure I was killed
With a good Italian pistol that he had
My chest he then thoroughly grilled

He came very close to me with a smile
The pistol of course he hid in his palm
He did not show an iota of hate
Then he shot me appearing very calm

He bowed to me well in reverence
With a smile on his face with no ire
His eyes were fixed steadily on me
As he opened from the pistol the deadly fire

Zulfikhar. Bapu. Relax. Enough of this jig. You will get tired. I heard so. I was only a child at that time. How bad it was!

Gandhi. You heard correctly. Why feel bad? There was nothing wrong. I personally feel. One day I had to die. In fact I asked Jawaharlal to dissolve Congress party after
independence. But he did not listen. They wanted power and fame. They waited for it so long. It was right in front of them. Will any fool leave? In fact I was a fool and I refused all power. I know some how that power would corrupt people. Power will spoil even greatest saints. (Takes deep breath and sighs…). Any how Zulfikhar, why are you getting worried now. You are already dead. Nothing can change now. You were no less. You were highly anti Indian too. When Indian plane was hijacked to Pakistan and was burnt in the airport you danced at air port as a mad guy. You called Indians dogs. Why do you forget al these things? In 1971, you literally fell at Indira’s feet begging. I know every thing.

Zulfikhar. Bapu. They are all past things and tricks for survival. Bapu, in Pakistan a politician will survive only if he is anti Indian. So I had to be. I had to earn bread and make to the top place that I did.

Gandhi. Oh. What a guy! Ohfo. Look Zulfikhar.Please take that stone lying in that corner and bang on my bald head. My head is really paining like hell… My head is aching like hell……hit me.. bang me..

Zulfikhar. Sir I have lot of regards for you. Without you, Pakistan would not have taken birth?

Gandhi. What is there with me? It is al Allah’s wish ( He looks at sky with folded hands in reverence) ( at the word of Allah Gandhi gets more sentimental. Fro a corner he takesa laced skull cap worn by Muslims and puts it on.)

Zulfikhar. You look better now sir. Sir I have a strong doubt. Can I ask?

Gandhi. Please go ahead son. Be bold. We have already died. No one can kill us now.

Zulfikhar. Sir. If our Jinnah sahib was made PM after English men left, I think both the nations could have been one and partition could have been avoided. Today’s all troubles and wars could have been avoided.

Gandhi. I do not think. Jinnah’s mind was already poisoned. In combined India, he thought his rule would be for a very short period. With one election, he would have been sent to oblivion. In Pakistan, he thought he would be eternal PM or President… haaa…haa..heee…heee. Poor fellow died without enjoying power for long. He was already a TB patient. He lies buried in a grave that is visited by all sundry who feel pity on him. After all God is there. See Pakistan is in a shit pot now. You pay for your deeds.

Zulfikhar.You mean Allah.

Gandhi. Oh Yes…of course.. You call anything. He is mighty.. sings Raghupathi Raaghava Raaja Ramm….eeee…

Zulfikhar. Patteetha Pavaan seetha Ram… oh sorry. I am a Muslim. I should not sing in praise of Hindu gods… I praised Hindu gods with this tongue. I must cut off my tongue.

Gandhi. Relax. Don’t be mad Bhutto sahib. Now tell me Bhutto sahib. Why should you be so ambitious? You could have taken things lightly. I think you were too scared of opponents. Elimination is not the solution. You paid for the folly. Pakistan is not India. In India, no one has been hanged from field of politics. So much of political mischief has been done since gaining independence. But no one was hanged. If it was in Pakistan, half of the leaders would have been sent to gallows. The best part in India is never ending court trials. The trials go on for life long. Godse’s case was an exception. He was hanged within a year. They were rather in hurry.

Zulfikhar. Sir. This is politics. Here fittest would survive. Your theories of all round brotherhood will not wok. One has to be ruthless

Gandhi. Zia ul Haq has done exactly the same thing to you. He was ruthless and hanged you.

Zulfikhar. Sir. I thought army would be out of politics

Gandhi. Dear. Can a Tiger keep quiet after eating a man?. You can never trust army particularly in Pakistan. You did and paid by your life. History shows it. Iskandar
Mirza,Ayub Khan, Yahya Khan, Zia Ul haq… I do not know how many Khans will be there in future..

Zulfikhar. Bapu. Atleast your country is free from this.

Gandhi.I do not know how long. Nehru knows it better. .. Even in India Nehru was damned scared of Gen Cariappa and Gen Thimmayya. He had no sleep as long as Thimmayya was there in chair. Even Indira was scared of Gen Manekshaw. Our polical bosses are lucky that army in India is free and away from politics.( With in himself.. Hope they would continue..if so, how long.Every thing looks calm… But behind every calm see tempest also lurks.) Nehru lives close by. I shall send my secretary Mahadev Desai to fetch him.

( After some Nehru arrives in his usual attire along with Krishna menon the former Defense minister of Chinese war ill fame and General Kaul. They greet Gandhiji and Bhutto. In the back ground, song Saare jahanse accha Hindostan Hamara..hamaara.. is heard in typical TV style)

Nehru. Bapu. What is the matter? You have not left me here too. Now what happened?

Gandhi. Come on. Do not be rough with me. You can not be. Please do not forget that I made you PM although every one felt that Patel was better. I bulldozed my way through. How much difference it would have made?

Nehru. Why dig the past now. Did I beg you to make me PM?

Gandhi. I do not remember it now. By the by what is Kaul doing here?

Nehru. Bapu. We are writing a book.. “ How we bungled the Chinese issue in 1962”.

Zulfikhar. Punditji. It is nice thing you bungled the Chinese issue. Otherwise how we would have been close to Chinese? How we could build Karakom highway?

Nehru. You mean I helped you indirectly.

Zulfikhar. Yes. You commit blunders and we take advantage.

Nehru. When partition took place, we thought we would live like brothers.

Gandhi. Yes living like brothers but with swords crossed.

Kaul.Bapu. Am I required here?

Gandhi. I think you are getting suffocated. That is what happened to you during Chinese war. You just vanished leaving troops in bloody front.

( In the back ground, wailing sounds of ghosts of dead soldiers from Chinese war are heard. They are singing.

Jago sone walo.. suno meri kahani

Tara rara rari.. Bhoot… bangla…eeee..eee

(Wake up Oh guys sleeping and listen to my story..) (Kishore’s song from Bhoot Bangla)

(From somewhere, the ghost of Major Shaitan singh the martyr of Chinese war walks in)

Shaitan singh. Bapu.. Bapu.. Listen. I was sacrificed at the altar of freedom by this Kaul while he ran away. See, he is enjoying in company of Nehruji.

Kaul. That is life in army. But you were rewarded with Parma veer Chakra. What else you want? In wars, some die and some live. Some get decorated for nothing. Some real deserving heroes go unnoticed.

Shaitan singh. What I will do with that? Who has bothered for my family after the war?

Kaul. Look. No one bothers for any one in world to day. . More so in army. You know, no one is bothered for a soldier once he leaves uniform. You are talking about dead? ( Yawns). How ignorant you are? God bless you.

Nehru. Come on Gen Kaul. Why are you getting into arguments with him? Do not waste time. Pay attention to our books.

( Major Shaitan singh’s Ghost disappears after touching feet of Gandhi not before shouting, “ down with Kaul and Nehru and Menon”)

( In the background, famous singer Mukesh is heard sadly singing..

Mujhe tumse kuch bin chahiye
Mujhe mere haal pe chod do.
Mujhe mere haal pe chod do….ooh…( From film Kanhiah)

Gandhi. How true Mukesh is? That is exactly is required from army. No expectations from Government, senior bosses and society. They will be happiest. Look Jawaharlal. Don’t you think we should make this song as the marching song for army? How motivating it is! It is the gospel of Buddha, absolute renunciation in spirit.. eee…eeee. So good it is.. I am getting inspired to do march past on this song over band.

(Gandhi tries to do march past with hands swinging 180 degrees to and fro and falls down unable to do. He sprains his shoulders. All help him to get up and he is given Nimusilide tablet by Mahadev Desai)

Nehru. True Bapu. But this song suits more for slow march used in funerals and inspecting guards

Gandhi. This is not a real problem. One can always modify tune.

(Suddenly Mohd Ali Jinnah walks in He is famished and sporting Sherwani and fez cap.He looks like a moving skeleton with Sherwani. He wishes Gandhi and others)

Jinnah. Salaam wale kum every one.( Sings doing jig)

Salaam walekum antaa bagunara
Meeranta bagunnara
Kallappaginchi choosthare
Nene nene bhai sab. ….Salamm…walekum…

(Salutations.. How is every one?
Are all fine?
Why do you stare with wide eyes?

This is me.. This is me..
Oh dear brother)

( Song from Telugu from film Laila Majnu by ShivRao)

Jinnah.Bapu and Nehru. You are always together. What is the discussion? I overheard Bhutoo was saying that Nehru bungled Chinese issue. Why only Chinese? What about Kashmir? See How nice it is? It is burning like Kafirs funeral pyre…

Gandhi. Jinnah. You were the head there You only allowed Pak troops into Kashmir. Isn’t it?

(Jinnah remains calm.. He is overcome by cough. He is unable to breath. He utters Yah Allah. Yah Allah. Have mercy on me.Mujhe bachalo.. Mere bap.. Yaa.. Alah)

Nehru. Why ask for mercy now? After doing everything?

Jinnah. After doing some thing only one asks for mercy. Don’tyou know this?

Gandhi. Please forgive him He accepted that he did wrong. He is asking for mercy from Alah.( sings)

Vaishnavajanako denere kahiye… ye..yee..yee
Eee….ee… beena…. parayee…eee jane re..eee…ee

Zulfikhar. ( Bows to Jinnah and sits at his feet.) Qaid e Azam sir. You have done right thing. You have ditched these Indian Kafirs very well. Kashmir is ours. No one can take it. It is a question of time. What these kafirs can do? In past, did these Kafirs win any war?Look This Gandhi glorified as father of nation and as Mahatma can sing only Raghupathi .. Raaghava..Rajja ram even when we severe his head. He can not raise his hand even. We must happy that he made the nation impotent to etrninty.He put Nehru in saddle afterindependence. He ensured that future generations continue to be politically impotent. Think of Kasim,Ghaznavi, Ghori, Baber, Abdali. All of them butchered these nuts in India. One day Junagarh will be ours, Hyderabad Deccan will be ours. I can hear the soul of Osman Ali Khan still wailing and calling for our help. Kashmir will be ours, and whole India will be ours as a matter of fact. We ruled for centuries. Remember guys. Jis kaa lathi us ka bhains ( Buffalo belongs to the one with stick)

(Patel suddenly rushes in angrily. )

Patel. Mr Bhutto. Just Shut up. This is not UNO or Pakistan where you could talk all shit. Bakwas band karo.. namune.. Chamdi uttar dunga. Zaban sambhalke. ( Stop talking all non sense. I shall skin you and cut off tongue. Chup ho jao.Naheeto… nateeja theek nahee hoga..)

Gandhi. Patel. Calm down. Jawaharlal. Please take care of him.

Nehru. Mr Bhutto. Have you forgotten what my daughter did to you?

Zulfikhar. What is so great? Our Eastern wing was very far and could easily be cut off. Is it a great victory? The Yankees let us down. My blood boils when I see the surrender photograph with Gen Niazi signing the instrument of surrender.

( From pocket he takes out the surrender photograph and tears it into pieces)

Nehru. That is with Gen Arora and Niazi with Gen Joseph in back ground. I wonder why Arora could not become the Chief?

Zulfikhar. You were dead long ago. How could you see the photo? Nehru sahib Remember. Hard work, efficiency and devotion can not ensure promotion. There are other aspects too that matter. Chamchagiri, bootlicking is a vital trait for promotion in uniformed services.

Nehru.Nonsense.. This is none of your business. Plesae know that my daughter came here after operation blue star and she brought the photo.

Zulfikhar .( jumps up in great ecstasy) Yah Alah.. Alah ho Akbar, every one pays back. She ruined us. She was shot dead. I am happy( does very fast jig happily and sings)

Indira ruined us in war
She was shot dead by her own men
Allah sees all with one eye
These deeds are written with a gold pen

Nehru ( weeps) Tears roll down from eyes. He wipes tears with a clean hanky given by Mahadev Desai.)Bapu.You what this guy is uttering? My entire family sacrificed for the nation. My daughter was shot dead by guards. My dear grand son Rajiv Gandhi was blasted off by LTTE of Sri Lanka. My another grand son crashed in a plane. I lost my sick wife. Is this I have to hear from this kid? History has not been fair to me.eee..eee..aa… ( sings)

Jab dil hee toot gaya
Ham jeeke kya karenge
Jab dil hee toot gaya
Ulfat ka diya hamne
Is dil me jalayaatha
Ummidke phoolonse
Iis gharko sajjayatha….

(Why I should I live
When my heart is broken
The lamp of love
I lit in my heart
With flowers of expectations
I decorated my house…

( KLSaigal from film Shahjehan)

Gandhi. Relax dear. History has proved that political power can not be enjoyed without risks Your family members enjoyed power one after the other and you were interested too. You created a dynasty. So face music too. Any how, I feel bad for you (sings)

Raghupathi Raghava Raaja ram..eeee…aaaa.. Pateetha pavan aseetha Ram..
Looks around and no one is seen singing along with him)

Nehru.. Ram nam japana..Ho Ram naam Japna( Say salutations to Lord Rama)

Zulfikhar. Ho.. Paraya maal apna.. Ho Paraya maal apna..Hindostan hai apna ( Other’s property is mine)

Jinnah. Kashmir bhee apna..saari duniya hai apna. Allah ho Akbar ( Kashmir is also ours.. Allah is great)

Patel .. Khali rahega tumhara sapna…jo Sone hal. Sat sree akal.( Your dream will be empty.. God is great..)

Gandhi. Ohfo.. Ram..Ram.. Am I here to listen to this nonsense? Ee..eeee..aaaa…aaa. cluck..gluck…eee…eee.Haa..haa. Margaya re.. Mujhe sambhalo re… Hare Raam.. Kaha hai re. Bacho. ( faints)


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