Friday, August 10, 2012


Dr K Prabhakar Rao
(It is heavens and a workshop is going on where all great past scientists of world have gathered. Gandhi, Patel and Nehru are the special invitees. One can find Archimedes,Marconi,Joule,James watt, Neil Bhor, Einstein, Newton, Ampere, Bhabha, Jagadeesh Chandra Bose, CV Raman, Avogadro, Boyle, Claussius, Charles, Otto, Diesel, Henry, Faraday and many more. Gandhi, Patel and Nehru are invited to the dais and are sharing the honors. The workshop concluded after many deliberations by the eminent scientists and Gandhi is giving the concluding speech. )
Gandhi. Gentlemen. I am really honored today to be here and sharing the thoughts with you all. I am not a scientist and basically I am a barrister. World can never forget contributions of all of you. The world is enjoying the fruits of your discoveries and inventions while you are forgotten and your memories are confined to book racks.. Todays engineering students in India particularly in the state of Andhra Pradesh do not remember your names even; leave aside your laws and contribution.
(There is a great silence all over and every one is stunned at his words)
Gandhi. Please believe me. I am telling truth. I am not joking with you. After completing four years of Engineering study, the graduate cannot answer very simple questions like what is ohms law and what are the units of capacitor, resistance and inductance.I was told that a graduate answered at an interview that current I in a circuit is given by Resistance R divided by Voltage V.
Audience. Shame. Shame. Shame
( Suddenly a sound and loud shriek is heard and there is great commotion as a scientist falls from the chair. People rush to him)
Gandhi. What happened there? Did I say any thing wrong?
Avogadro. Sir , Mr Ampere the great scientist collapsed. His pulse has fallen. We are taking him to guest house. He is violently shaking his hands and pulling his hair.
Boyle. Mr Gandhi. The current in a circuit is given by Voltage V divided by Resistance R. This is as per Ohms law. The units of current are amperes. Mr Ampere got upset after hearing from you. .
Gandhi. I really feel sorry for the situation. I am even ashamed to tell these things .But this is a fact.
Avogadro. Sir, What can be the reasons for such downfall among Engineering graduates in the state of Andhra Pradesh.?
Gandhi. In India particularly in South India, the Engineering education has been commercialized. Earlier in the state of Andhra Pradesh things were not bad. There were very few Engineering colleges and merit students joined the courses and standards were maintained.
Boyle. Then what happened?
Gandhi. Many aspirants used to migrate to neighboring states such as Karnataka and Maharashtra and Tamil nadu to study Engineering courses where private colleges were there.. Vested interests took advantage of the situation and in AP too private engineering colleges were sanctioned. Lot of money changed hands surely. All of you know that nothing moves in India without wetting hands of top guys. From top to bottom is a shit pot. Although there were very few colleges in private sector initially in Hyderabad, soon they multiplied with leaps and bounds. Now there are more than 700 such colleges in AP alone.
Boyle. Eeee…eeee.. so many! Disgusting indeed!
Charles. Amazing! Do you have teachers there?
Gandhi. That is doubtful. At some places, I do not think they have. If they have, they are not well qualified with experience. It is an eye wash. Fresh graduates are recruited for a small amounts and are made to stand on the dais. They are name sake teachers designated as Asst Professors..
Diesel. Disgusting indeed!
Gandhi. Most of the colleges do not have proper labs, libraries, journals and Professors.
Otto. Then how college is managed?
Gandhi. It is the mercy of god. Allah ke sahare chalta hai. ( They run by mercy of Allah)
Avogadro. How students are admitted there?
Gandhi. The govt conducts an examination after intermediate course and students have to qualify in that. After the examination, qualified students are given ranks. Students join colleges after giving preference for a course at the college of given choice. The admission is based on reservations based on categories of caste and quotas. These quota system you guys will not understand because in your countries you are free of these problems. We are sunk deep in a shit pot from which we can not come out.
Boyle. I see.
Gandhi. There is nothing to see sir. It is like a blind man shooting an arrow into a well.
( All laugh hee..hee..haaa..haaa..hooo..hoo..hey..hey..Boyle laughs loudly and gets hiccups. He is given water by an attender.He calms down.)
Gandhi. Gentlemen. Therefore, we must suggest some ways and means to solve the problem faced in AP state in India. I think we must form a committee to visit AP state and study the system there. After this works hop let us form a team. I thank all of you for giving me this opportunity to be with you. Thanks. Jai Hind.
( All clap loudly and the workshop ends. All move to a hall where tea and snacks are served.In tea room Nehru and Patel approach Gandhi)
Nehru. Bapu. What was the need for you to say such things about our system?
Gandhi. What is wrong in that? What I said is true.
Patel. Jawaharlal, Why are you after Bapu. He told truth. Is telling truth a crime?
Nehru. But we are lowering country’s image.
Patel. Hope we have some thing like that.
Nehru. Then how we are producing missiles, tanks, guns software, computers etc ?
Patel. In such places bright people are there. Bright people always flourish at all places. Only 10 percent of Engineering graduates are employable. Rest is a scrap as per some studies. They are of no use. They do not know any thing. They can not write two lines correctly and say two sentences without grammatical mistakes.
( The conversation is overheard by some scientists. Two scientists Diesel and Otto shriek loudly and collapse. They are found violently shaking legs and hands and are being attended by fellow scientists. They become pale. )
Patel. Bapu. Let us go from here. Or else we may be in trouble.
Gandhi. How about the committee?
Patel. We shall see at that later.
Nehru. True.This is not the time to discuss further. In fact none of them would like to be members of such committee.
Patel. Hee..Hee ..Hee.. What a reputation indeed !
Nehru. Look Patel. This is not the time for joking.
Gandhi. Yes. You guys are very correct. Some times telling truth becomes dangerous. Run from here.
( The trio vanishes from the hall)

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