Saturday, April 4, 2009




Prof Dr Colonel K Prabhakar Rao ( Retired)

( Gandhi, Nehru and Patel are seen walking on a very crowded street in Hyderabad. There are numerous cars, motor cycles and all types of transport on the road. The trio are seen walking in middle of the road and reach a junction where traffic lights are fixed. No lights are working. There is one Police man standing there and trying to guide the traffic. He is chewing pan ( Beatle leaf) )

Gandhi. Look ! Jawaharlal. What type of traffic is here? There appears to be no order around

Nehru. True Bapu. But it is not only the road. Every where it is same. Story is same. It is not only Hyderabad, but throughout the country life is like that.

Gandhi. ( Gets excited) Look…Look… Patel. See How that motor cyclist is seated on the bike! Why he has bent his neck so much and still driving the bike. His face pointing to sky and making efforts to look straight. Is his neck broken?

Nehru. Bapu. Probably he is born with a deformed neck. Poor guy! God bless him.

Patel. (Laughs) Haa…haa.. Bapu and Nehruji. It is not like that. That joker is absolutely fine. There is no deformity. He is listening to a cell phone while travelling. The phone is pressed between his ear and shoulder. There is no doubt after some years he will have serious neck illness and will not be able to keep his head vertical. If he keeps his head would reel and would fall down. After some years their new born children would have deformed necks. You know Prof Darwin said that species would evolve to suit living conditions. So human beings in India in coming years could have bent neck with tilted head and eyes place at different plane. (Laughs) hee…heee

Nehru. Why do you laugh Patel? We must feel sorry for them. Better educate them on the dangers.

Patel. You may do it if you like. But Indians are nuts. They are good at breaking rules and have no discipline. I do not think your counseling would make any difference.

Gandhi. How dangerous it is to drive like that? Is it allowed?

Patel. No Bapu. Police has made a law prohibiting use of cell phones while driving. They can be fined heavily.

Gandhi. That is very good by police. But this guy is openly flouting orders. I must do some thing to stop this.

Nehru. Bapu. What will you do?

Gandhi. Keep seeing

( Gandhi runs to the motor cyclist who has halted at the crossing and his sudden running creates great confusion on the road and a car is about to hit him and another bike almost crashes into him)

Andhi. Eee….eeeee…. Save.. Can’t you see me crossing the junction. Don’t you have eyes

Motorcyclist. Hey old man. Better behave. Why are you running on the road? Are you mad?

( Gandhi goes to the motorcyclist and snatches his cell phone and the motor cyclist protests and looses balance and falls down and the bike falls on him and there is some commotion around. The Motor cyclist was carrying a bag full of onions tied to handle bar. All the onions fall on the road and roll every where. The motor cyclist gets up and starts abusing Gandhi and starts fighting with him. He snatches his stick and the watch too. Patel and Nehru also reach there and try to separate them. In the mean time the police constable also reaches the spot)

Constable. Hey Guys….go out…move out…Chal (Move) What is happening?

Motor cyclist. Sir. This old man came and assaulted me while I was sitting on my bike.

Constable. Is it true? If so why you have done?

Gandhi. Look Constable. I did not assault him. I saw him using cell phone while driving his bike. That was against law. So I ran to him and pulled out his cell phone. He lost balance and fell down. See This is the cell phone he was using.( He hands over the cell phone)

Constable (Looking at the motorcyclist) were you using cell phone? What is your name? Where is your driving license? Show me your vehicle documents!

Motor cyclist. I am Nathuram. This is my license and these are my vehicle papers. Any thing further. I was holding cell phone. But not talking.

Constable. How can you hold cell phone while driving a bike?

Motorcyclist. It was on my shoulder. It is fixed with a clip and tape

Constable. Is this the way to carry a cell phone. There is a pocket for you in shirt and pant. Obviously you were talking into it bending your head over it.

Gandhi. True. He was doing that

Constable. Look old man. This is not your job to catch people. We are there for it.

Nehru. But you did not see him. How can you? There are hundreds of vehicles every minute.

Constable. Still sir. You can not do that. You are not police men. Not even home guards.

Patel. So we should not catch a thief if we see. Is it OK?

Constable (Getting jittery) I do not mean that. Catching thieves is different. This is different.

( In the mean time large crowd gathers and there is a traffic jam and a mobile police team Rakshak arrives with a police inspector)

Inspector ( Gets down from the vehicle) What is happening here? Why this traffic jam?

( The constable explains everything to him and the police Inspector orders the constable to shift the bike to the road side and give a challan to the motorcyclist for talking over a cell phone while driving. He also wants Gandhi, and his friends to some to the roadside)

Inspector. Look sir. I do not who you are, but you look respectful and you are dressed like Gandhi and your friends are like Nehru and Patel. Are you from a drama Party?

Gandhi (Getting upset) Look Inspector. None of us are from any drama party. We are not fake. We are real Gandhi, Nehru and Patel.

Inspector. How can it be? You can not fools us.

Gandhi. Why should we do that?

Inspector. Does it mean that we are already fools?

Gandhi. I did not say that.

Inspector. Look. Your sudden running on the road caused trouble. Why should you try to catch that guy? How many will you catch like this? Can you amend all these undisciplined Hyderabadis? We have been struggling every day with these crowds on the roads. We are helpless. Any rule we make, they would break it. Any how, please do not do next time. I am much impressed with your dress and make up. How much you earn every day in this make up.

Gandhi. What do you mean Inspector by this? I already told that we are not fake and we are real. You can not insult us like this.

Inspector. I think you guys will not listen like this. You appear to be some educated tricksters. I shall deal with you at the police station.

( He looks at the mobile team and orders them to catch the trio and put them in the van and the itching constables rush at the trio shouting haa..haa..haaa)

Gandhi. Stop you guys. You do not know us. Look into our eyes if you have guts.

( The Constables stop and stare into Gandhi who twists his hand and gestures like Mandrake the magician. All the constables and the Inspector are thrown twenty feet away and fall in a heap among many vehicles and some bikes fall on them along with riders. Some roadside barricades too fall on them. Two cows that were squatting on the roadside get terrified and trample them hissing and puffing. There is again a great traffic jam and the fallen guys scream… arre…arte.. Bacho, Margaya,,, Ya allah.. Bacho… Maaa.. Bapu.. Abba…. Amma… Bacho. There is a cacophony of sounds with hundreds of vehicles blowing horns and hooting. Gandhi and his friends smile and walk away slowly. In the distance , song of Kavi Pra deep is heard)

Dekh tere sansar ki haaalat kya ho gayi Bhagwan

Kitna Badal gaya insaan

Sooraj na badla Chndna badla

Naa badlare aasaman…Kitna

Badal gaya insaan.

Dr K Prabhakar Rao

No comments: